Why You Must Stop Searching For Your Soulmate

Are you unhappy in love because you’re desperately trying to find your soulmate? There’s a better way! You don’t have to spend your entire life looking for love. In fact, true love might be right in front of you.

Open yourself to love and you might just find the soulmate you seek!

Consider these ideas: 

1. Research shows that focusing too much on finding your soulmate can lead to unhealthy thoughts.
   •  You may have unrealistic expectations about your relationships. 
   •  You may give up too easily on potential partners if they don’t fit your cookie-cutter idea of a soul mate. 
   •  Being to focused on finding a soul mate can interfere with your work, family, and friends because you can’t think about anything else. 
2. Are you ignoring love that isn’t perfect? Relationships can go through many stages, and they’re not perfect.
   •  If you’re only looking for a soulmate, it’s easy to miss other romantic interests that could develop into the love you’re looking for.
   •  Many friendships turn romantic over the course of time. But if you’re not willing to give anyone a chance, then you’ll never see that person as anything more than just a friend.
      
   •  Becoming obsessed with finding your soulmate can make it harder to be patient in a relationship. You may get upset by small issues and give up on your partner quickly. You could lose a relationship that could turn into the love of a lifetime.
3. You don’t want to miss out on other important things. When your entire life revolves around finding true love, you can miss out on other things.
   •  Are you ignoring your career to pursue romantic interests?
   •  Are you neglecting family members and friends because you’re too busy trying to start a new relationship? 
   •  Do you ignore your hobbies and other interests? 
   •  Although love is essential, romantic relationships aren’t the only thing that matters. 
4. Avoid scaring potential loves away. After you meet someone, if you think they’re the one, then you may push too hard and actually scare them away.
   •  Relationships need time and space to grow. You can’t force them, and if you’re pushing too hard, they can fall apart. 
   •  By deciding that your partner must be your soulmate, you’re putting an enormous amount of pressure on the entire relationship. Your partner can feel overwhelmed and scared. 
5. Relax. Therapists recommend relaxing and letting relationships develop naturally. If you relax, you’re actually more likely to find love.
   •  Relaxing can strengthen your mental and physical health, so you’ll be able to handle a relationship easier. 
   •  You may also seem more attractive to others if you’re relaxed. Feeling nervous, impatient, angry, upset, or aggressive can make those around you feel the same way when they’re with you, so they may avoid you. 
6. Remember: Fairy tales aren’t real. Stories about romantic love create unrealistic expectations for relationships. In reality, trying to find love can be messy and difficult.
   •  Hoping for a storybook romance can be dangerous to finding true love. Love is a journey instead of instant attraction and marriage. 
   •  The issue with these traditional fairy tale ideas is that they don’t apply to the real world. You don’t need to be rescued or be the rescuer to find love.  What you do need, is to love your own life. The relationship should be the icing to an already delicious cake.  How yummy would that be?

Searching too much for a soulmate can interfere with many important aspects of your life and keep you from ever finding love. Opening your heart to possibilities can bring you the true love you desire sooner than you think!

In the meantime, relax and enjoy the journey.  And when you do finally say those 3 magical words, it will be well worth the dance.  

Caterina Barregar

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